Tired of the same old junk Hollywood keeps giving us? There’s a simple solution. Find a kid. Any kid. Let them write the script. Have their parents act it out. Dub the kids’ voices over their parents. You’ve got a cinematic masterpiece!
Why did no one alert me to this? You’re all fired.
I apologize in advance for any typographical errors you may find in today’s post. I am pecking out the words using only my stumps, for I recently lost both my hands in one of those all-too-common household accidents.
I was hungry for some eggs, and the only way I know how to get the…
FIRST KISS We asked twenty strangers to kiss for the first time…
I think the beauty in this video is its simplicity and how vulnerable the people in it are and it’s so awkward and wonderful and lovely and makes me want to smoosh my lips against someone else’s lips and you should definitely watch this video.
Mum’s been persuaded into the garden. She can’t remember what I said 20 seconds ago but she can still rock a pair of sunnies. It’s 15 degrees and I’m sitting here in a vest eating biltong. It’s summer, you guys. It’s summer. ☀️
I’m spending my 5th to last day at work doing important things:
looking up gifs of dogs doing stupid things;
browsing puppies to adopt at Battersea Dogs Home;
locking and unlocking my new iPhone 5s with the fingerprint sensor (I’m still gobsmacked at how great this is).
I’ve now got my phone to recognise all 10 fingers. I wonder if I can get it to recognise and unlock using the tip of my nose. Or with certain arm movements during interpretive dance pieces. The world is just full of possibilities.